|
|
|
|
January 1,
2012: |
| Will casinos
be next in line for the dynamic Six Sigma
Newt Gingrich, campaigning in Iowa a few weeks ago, looked down at
a ménage of Iowans decrying money wasted on the stimulus and other
doubtful projects. "I propose," he said, "the Lean Six Sigma method to cut
government waste." I'm not sure how many of those present understood what
he meant, but casino presidents, CEOs and others at the top of the gaming
ladder certainly should. I'm not an expert in Lean or Six Sigma, but I damn
well would be if I ran a casino. Using Lean Six Sigma or its forerunner,
Six Sigma, I believe the increase in a casino's profit would be enormous.
Motorola developed Six Sigma in the 80s as a business strategy to remove
errors--thereby improving output and selling products that were virtually
perfect. A few years later came Lean Six Sigma, supposedly from the Toyota
production system. Both Politico and EHow Money say Gingrich
also suggested Lean Six Sigma would eliminate at least $3 trillion of government
waste over 10 years. The US Army, according to
iSixSigma.com, reports
a financial benefit of almost $2 billion, and says GE saved $10 billion in
the first five years. Business Week says a "major enterprise" reduced
labor costs by 5% for an annual benefit of $2 billion, and Target Corp. claims
more than $100 million saved in six years. How do Six Sigma and Lean Six
Sigma differ? SS creates a number of company experts and calls them Black
Belts and Green Belts. These experts use data to focus on financial targets
that reduce cost or build profit. LSS uses SS rules to make decision-making
faster, reduce errors and improve the quality of the product. Both Six Sigma
and Lean Six Sigma originated in manufacturing companies--but service companies
are catching up. Now here's a hint if you're interested in Six Sigma and
Lean Six Sigma: just a few days ago, Amazon.com displayed five new books
that cover both. I guarantee you'll be impressed. |
top |
|
December 1,
2011: |
| With casinos
from UK to Miami The Genting Group thinks big
You
couldn't miss the page one headline in the Wall Street Journal's Nov. 29
edition. "Dreaming of a New Vegas in Miami," it read. The illustration that
accompanied the story looked like someone had used scrap aluminum to build
hotels and towers, then brought in Army tanks to smash in the sides. Must
have been a slip of the brush. Nevertheless, The Genting Group intends to
build a $3.8 billion casino resort with 5,200 rooms, 50 restaurants and a
shopping mall--all next to the ocean and US Highway 395, and not far from
downtown Miami. So they bought the existing Omni Center for about $251 million,
including a mortgage about to be foreclosed. But it was the perfect place
to start. The Omni, with 650,000 square feet that can handle the casino,
thus became the first phase of the project. Next, Genting bought the adjacent
Miami Herald (the newspaper that broke the Genting story last September)
for $236 million--and may put another casino there. Then the company hired
23 lobbyists. By October, Florida legislators decided to float a bill to
allow three casinos in south Florida. Get the picture? As for Genting, it's
what we used to call a conglomerate. The holding company of Genting Berhad
has similar companies in Malaysia, Singapore and Hong Kong. It also has five
resorts and casinos in Malaysia, two in Singapore, one in Hong Kong and 42
in the UK--all of them casinos. They found the US some time ago and planted
resorts in Miami and New York, plus a casino at Aqueduct racetrack. Oh yes.
They also own the Norwegian Cruise Line, a soccer club in Britain's top league
and just in case, Twitter, YouTube and FaceBook are prominent on the Genting
Web sites--all 38 million of them. Sounds like they're Genting along pretty
well. |
December 11,
2011: |
| The cry
of 'junk mail' is back: Post Office may be near death
I
watched nationally syndicated columnist Charles Krauthammer give his opinion
of the struggling-to-stay-alive USPS the other night. He thinks it should
close. "Junk mail!" he shouted--and I do mean shouted. The man became
boiling-over furious in seconds. Charles has been a favorite of mine for
years but his explosion on the O'Reilly show made me shake my head in wonder.
For all his smarts and witty commentary, he has no idea how valuable ordinary
postal mail is to a large number of businesses--including casinos. He probably
thinks email can carry the load. Most of the young people who use it think
that way, too. Because few ever write a letter or receive one I can see why.
Not many realize that seniors get very little mail, and when a letter is
addressed to them, studies show that most open it and read every line. And
those who are 55 and above overwhelmingly prefer postal mail over email.
A letter speaks person to person; email speaks computer to computer. And
for casinos, where the real players are usually more than 55, the loss of
direct mail would be devastating. I surveyed a few friends and found that
most of them think there's no way the USPS will close. "It's an American
icon," said one. Another called it "An historic slice of America that dates
back to the Pony Express." But my guess is they had no idea the Post Office
owes retired workers around 60 billion, which is why Krauthammer may have
lost it when he bellowed "Junk Mail!" My guess, and its been around for a
while, is that a public company will one day run it. And the reason is the
direct mail that flows by the billions into American homes. You may hate
to see the Postal service hand it over, but its death and the inevitable
effect on companies of all sizes would put hundreds of Postal workers on
the streets again--without mailbags and looking for a job. So never, ever,
under any circumstances, call it "Junk Mail." It's a bad name for business
mailers and casinos looking for prospects and customers. You'd miss it--bet
me. |
December 22,
2011: |
| 2-year-old
using an iphone? Rush him to the slot section
In
Andy Vuong's "From nap time to app time" in the Denver Post a few days ago,
he informs us that playtime for children has shifted from television and
video games to tablet computers and smartphones. I mean, should a kid younger
than 2 years of age get a piece of Apple's high tech for Christmas? Parents
are puzzled. So despite warnings from the American Academy of Pediatrics
and an assistant professor of cognitive neuroscience, babies that young will
be toddling around with apps in their mouths come January. Now look gang,
here's our chance. Tablets and iphones? Forget about it. Let's break the
kids in on slots and video poker. First, we teach the parents to put in a
ticket. Then their kid pounds the spin button with his tiny fist and the
screen in front of him goes bonkers. Reels spin or new sets of cards appear.
Everything is quick, flashy, and easy to understand. You know for sure the
kid is going to scream like you're beating him if you take him away from
the machine. And can you see a casino security guy running up to you and
shouting "The kid just hit a big one. What are you trying to do--steal it
from him?" Okay. So I'm kidding. No reason to get huffy about it. But if
we don't take action to bring the next generation of slot players into our
joints, Apple could run us out of business. Vuong quotes child advocacy group
Common Sense Media with this homily. "Half the children in the US live in
a home with a smartphone, a tablet or a digital music player. More than a
third have used one of these devices including children ages 1 and under."
Hell, all I wanted was a wagon. Now, says Vuong, "New-wave gadgets are so
intuitive and easy to use that an 18-month-old can swipe a finger to unlock
the device and tap on a icon to watch a YouTube clip." Experts say kids should
be allowed no more than two hours of screen time daily. But at least one
mother says she wants to expose her kids to the new technology to prepare
them for the future. Want to think some more about the slots idea? |
top |
|
November 1,
2011: |
| Post Office
pushing all out on the case for Direct Mail
One
day (in 2005, I think) the US Postal Service called and asked if they could
send two people out to talk to me. I said okay, we set a date, and the man
and woman who showed up really did want to talk to me. I had met the man
at a casino marketing convention in Las Vegas and chatted with him about
the good and bad of direct mail. Now these two were part of a Postal Service
team formed to battle the upstart Internet, the ominous prosperity of email,
and the millions in Social Networks who had (gasp) dared to bypass the PO.
I had written some pretty good letters for my casino clients and they had
seen some of them. And they always read my Direct Marketing column in IGWB
Magazine. One of my letters, pounded out for Tom Jenkin of Harrah's on the
day after 9/11, was powerful enough to stop or slow the burgeoning cancellations
from players who thought terrorists might hit Las Vegas. It worked so well
that Harrah's gave it to others in its chain. Worked for them, too. So we
talked for an hour or two and the PO people left. Not long afterward came
a Post Office magazine named "Deliver." Did it pitch the promised joys of
direct mail? Bet on it. Just last week I received the 40th edition of "Deliver."
It's a 4-page, 4-color magazine now and they come at direct mail from every
angle. In the Leader Column the writer says, "No matter what comes along,
direct mail will endure." The column goes on to state that direct mail "continues
to evolve and expand its reach...and its tangible form of messaging won't
break your budget." Of course, I hope the writer is correct. But in the casino
business, the direct mail I see grows steadily worse. It's seldom more than
four or five paragraphs and talks about the casino--not about the customer.
Instead of selling dreams, it tries to sell itself. Most letters are filled
with clichés and awful words such as "great," "exciting," "world class,"
and "needs" that no pro would ever run through the computer if he intended
to sell anything. Direct mail is, and always has been, an expression of my
love for selling in print. Anytime the Post Office needs another gun, I hope
they call me. |
November 11,
2011: |
| The Sahara
security guard who loved chasing cheats
A
few months ago new owners bought the Sahara in Las Vegas. It made big news
in the Las Vegas papers because of the daring events and promotions that
poured out of it for so long. When they closed the doors the Sahara had 60
years in the books. Sentimentality made a comeback when the new owners reopened
for a week to sell every picture, bed and barstool in the buildings. Most
went to Las Vegas locals, whose memories went back to the early 50s. I had
memories of the Sahara, too. In most of my 20 years as marketing director
I worked with men so talented we out-promoted and out-sold the rest of the
Strip every month--including December. Men such as Stan Irwin, Herb McDonald,
Sig Front, Alex Shoofey, Ed Nigro and Jack Eglash. We had a spirit no one
could match, much less overcome, and here's an example: One of my favorites
was Eddie Warren, our Security Chief. The guy just loved to discover slot
cheaters. He'd catch them, take them up to his office, and learn their
techniques. I've been told his office had indentations in its fiberboard
walls--the kind the back of your head would make if some guy grabbed you
by the face and shoved. Of course, I never saw anything like that. But I
did see Eddie at work one night on the Sahara casino floor. He had stalked
a slot player for hours because the man played only dime machines. In the
60s and 70s few players went after dime games, and here was a guy hitting
every one of ours and pocketing the winnings. Eddie couldn't figure out how
the player got dime machines to pay off, and he didn't know where the man
stashed his loot. Here was a challenge a man of Eddie's temperament couldn't
afford to lose, so he closed in on the cheater--who took off running down
the casino floor. Now, Eddie was always the kind of cop I wanted to chase
me if I stole anything. About 250 pounds, and built like a moose with stocky
legs. And a very slow runner. So to my surprise, Eddie kept gaining on the
player. He finally chased him out the front door, caught him and deposited
him on the cement. The man took off his boots and out poured dimes by the
thousands. No wonder he couldn't run away from Eddie--who arrested him, then
held the boots high in the air as he turned to the crowd that had gathered
"Son of a bitch was wearing Tony Lamas," Eddie said. "Just my size." (Excerpted
from John's newest book, "Las Vegas--Before the Lawyers." |
November 22,
2011: |
| Your ad
headline wins, or loses: make sure it explains the deal
"Evidence
is mounting that US ad spending, under pressure from a sputtering economy,
has begun to slip." When the Wall Street Journal leads with a sentence like
that, something dark and ominous is afoot. Research from Kantar Media, says
the Journal, shows ad spending rose only 4.4% in the first quarter of the
year, 2.9% in the second quarter, and has slumped even deeper in the third
quarter. Companies in the newspaper and magazine business have been cutting
back as well, and telecommunication companies and auto makers are also less
aggressive. Thank you, Kantar Media. Now, have you ever wondered why spending
on ads sometimes can get worse by the month? The economy? Sure. But in my
book, it's because so many ad agencies don't know how to write the damn things.
Their ads fall flat. The evidence against agencies that use "Indirect" headlines
in their ads, for example, is right in front of you every time you pick up
a newspaper. An "Indirect" headline hides the offer, yet agencies still write
headlines such as "Mistletoe only gets you so far," or "Did You Know?" or
"The Pledge." Do you have any idea what those headlines are advertising?
Of course not. The eye flicks past because the brain immediately knows not
to waste valuable time trying to decipher what the words mean. Same with
"funny" headlines. They just don' t get enough readers to bite. A "Direct"
headline is the opposite. When placed over a news story (for example) it
instantly tells the reader what the story is about. If the reader is interested,
he reads. It's the same with newspaper display ads. If "The Pledge" headline
had read, "A firefighter's dog can find you through a ton of rubble. Will
you help us train hundreds of these remarkable canines? " I wager the donations
would have been four times what they were. But for some reason, it seems
most of the writers and art directors who turn out ads these days prefer
a short, quick, cool headline that tells a reader nothing--and quickly loses
him. Remember that the next time your creative people tell you shorter is
better. It's not. |
top |
|
October 1,
2011: |
| Does a visit
to a casino make you call in sick?
:
In a recent story from Reuters, reporter Paula Rogo says 34 percent of Americans
who take summer holidays return home "Struggling with melancholy." Travel
Web site TripAdvisor polled 1,400 Americans to dig out the puzzling
percentage--and made it even worse with the discovery that for 64 percent,"the
blues descend even before the holiday ends." Most hated to come home to hundreds
or even thousands of emails at work, writes Rogo. A smaller number felt an
immediate strain the first day back, and 84 percent said their stress levels
quickly returned to pre-vacation highs. 12 percent admitted calling in sick
the first month after returning from their vacation. The story focused only
on the return home, not on the destinations. But the disturbing figures were
enough to make me wonder how casinos fare. What does a casino do to help
visitors return to their homes in good spirits? Not much. We're already at
work on the next group. What do they expect from us when they show up? Some
expect comps, and get them. Others never get a free meal. Some play and win.
Others lose their bankroll. Is there a way to make this last group go home
happy--or should we even try? They come with desires we can't measure and
they go home with feelings we can't understand. But you can be sure the ones
who go home in a sad mood won't be back soon--or maybe never. I can think
of a couple of things I'd test before launching a promotion to make them
all happy, or even to convince them we actually care. But that's another
story. I'm not sure anyone is prepared to change minds tomorrow. |
October 11,
2011: |
| Firearms,
not guns; Cuisine, not food
Would
you believe a single word can make a difference between a sale and a turndown?
In the world of advertising writers it happens all the time. One of the best
in the business is Herschell Gordon Lewis, author of On the Art of Writing
Copy, who tells of writing an ad for antique pistol replicas in which
he used the intellectual word firearms instead of the emotional word
guns. Why? Because he thought the word better justified the price.
When advertising expensive cars he substituted motorcar for
automobile. Same reason. In the letters I write for some casinos I'll
use luxury accommodations instead of luxury rooms, and cuisine
instead of food when they're mailing to the high end. And at the
end of every letter I write you'll always see the same two words, Thank
you. You can never say it too many times. Elmer Wheeler, who wrote a
magnificent little book named Tested Sentences That Sell, tells of
the time he made a client thousands of dollars with just two words. Wheeler
said he became thirsty one day, walked into the nearest drugstore and asked
for a Coca Cola. The clerk behind the counter said," Large or small, sir?"
Wheeler said "Small" without thinking, and the store lost a nickel. As he
sipped his Coke, he wondered how he would have replied if the clerk had said,
"Large one?" He immediately rushed to see the owners of the two largest
drugstores in New York. They liked the idea and tested five thousand customers
with "Large one?" Seven of every ten people said, Yes. Mr. Wheeler's
bank account soared. |
October 22,
2011: |
| Send two
identical mailings? It's an Ebbinghaus discovery
When
I saw an ad for Chief Marketer's Webinar on resending emails, I couldn't
resist writing my friends at the Chief. They're sharp, these people, and
I've been praising them for years. So when I saw the topic it brought back
memories of a day 17 years ago when the headline on my column in IGWB magazine
read, "Beyond the Ebbinghaus Curve." Now, I should mention Dr. Ebbinghaus
had a superb solution to a non-problem when he made the news in 1885. A good
start, yes. But not immediately. Ebbinghaus set out to prove a standard curve
of forgetfulness actually existed, and he succeeded. He proved, for example,
that 75% of the information you learn on any given day will be forgotten
in two weeks. By the fourth week you've forgotten 95% of it. But how could
you use such knowledge in 1885? Well, sparingly, unless you wanted to get
a reputation as a mad scientist. But when Direct Mail came along, I believe
Ebbie happened to tell a mailer he could send out a package, mail an exact
duplicate two or three weeks later, and haul in half as many responses as
the identical first mailing did. Not everyone put faith in such an oddity,
but your faithful reporter was hooked. When I'd give a seminar, some in the
audience would argue that those who resent the same package made themselves
look like fools. How, I'd ask innocently? Invariably, the audience believed
the prospects would remember the first mailing. My answer was, "Tell the
truth. Do you remember what you got in the mail last week? How about what
you got yesterday?" Not a soul remembered. Then I'd launch into reasons why
sending the same piece twice was a solid tactic that would return half as
many responses as you received from the first piece. When no one believed
that, I tried it three times. Sure enough, response ranged from 47% to 52%.
Can Chief Marketer's Webinar do the same thing with email? I don't have a
clue--but I do have a call in for Ebbinghaus. |
top |
|
September 1,
2011: |
| First they
steal your face, then they pick your pocket
"Picture
this," wrote Shan Li and David Sarno of the Los Angeles Times. "You stop
in front of a digtital advertising display at a mall. Suddenly an ad pops
up touting makeup, followed by one for shoes, then one for butter pecan ice
cream." Good gosh! The digital display scanned your features, consulted its
stash of human faces and what they like, and tailored its message to you.
The Venetian resort hotel and casino in Las Vegas, say Li and Sarno, is already
using it to steer guests into the casino's restaurants, clubs, and entertainment.
I'm not against slathering the public with digital ads, but I'm a direct
marketer, and I always advise businesses to test their ads before they run
them in the public prints. It's anathema to us when someone announces a product
that's "new" and "original." Those words, to direct marketers, mean "untried"
and "untested." My guess is many companies, especially large ones, will be
overcome by the audacity of facial recognition and demand to have it. Maybe
they don't know the Privacy Cops are lying in wait to nail the first advertiser
who uses your face to pick your pocket. Listen, if I saw a digital ad that
showed me a Jobs computer, followed by the newest edition of Strunk and White,
and an Epson printer that could finish my copy before I wrote it, I'd probably
call Lifelock. I mean, this is my life they're tinkering with. People may
be blase about personal articles, but when the advertiser can take a digital
shot, store it in their files and use facial recognition to sell you every
damn thing you like, the recently discovered privacy module in your right
front lobe could take over and we'd have to call Homeland Security. And they're
busy enough--aren't they. |
September 11,
2011: |
| New way
to live alone; Just keep looking up
At
first glance it looks like an exceptionally bulky baseball cap. A test model
dug out of the trash, perhaps. Or an embarrassing screw-up by the new Director
of Caps. The girl wearing it is pretty, but the brim is so thick you see
her face only from the nose down. The cap's heavy, outsized brim and the
cloth straps that sweep back over her ears might mean she's a Starship Trooper.
Naw. Gradually your mind hisses the truth. It's a "Personal 3-D Viewer."
The inventors at Sony say the device gives you a private 3-D theater of music
videos, movies and games. Which is fine if you want to eat, party, dance
and live your life alone. Just remember your eyes must always be directed
to the underside of the brim. You want to become a loner? This is the way
to do it. Direct marketer that I am, I immediately wondered where I could
get a mailing list of loners--people who just love to look at the brims of
their hats for hours at a time. I dove into every direct marketing magazine
I take. Not a single loner list in any of them. But maybe ad agencies would
love it. Not a chance. How could they make any money from an ugly hat that
gives you neck pains from looking under the brim all day? But the "Personal
3-D Viewer" might be a hit in some country that had never heard of it. I
imagined making a winner out of a monstrosity. Do you think they'd like it
in China? They're shorter over there and might be able to look up easier.
Just a thought. |
September 22,
2011: |
top |
|
August 1,
2011: |
| Goodbye,
"Great Imposter." Please leave the chicken suit
"The
Great Imposter" died a month ago, but his reputation lingers. A furious Dodger
manager Tommy Lasorda once chased him out of the Baseball All-Star game.
A Rabbi at his memorial service praised him with, "More than a man, he's
a force." When Betty Thomas of "Hill Street Blues" was slow reaching the
stage to accept her Emmy," he dashed up and accepted it for her. Barry Bremen,
businessman by trade, became "The Great Imposter" in the late 70s. By the
1980s he had millions of followers. Barry was a good-natured guy who never
intended to hurt anyone, but his talent for slinking into sports stadiums
built him a formidable reputation. He just disguised himself and walked in.
Easy as that. He strolled into the 1979 Baseball All-Star game in Seattle
dressed in a Yankee uniform. Next thing you knew he was catching fly balls
in the outfield. He dressed as an umpire for the 1980 World Series game between
the Royals and Phillies and started to explain the rules before they caught
him. Sports Illustrated said he slipped onto the sidelines during a 1979
football game between the Cowboys and Redskins wearing a Cowboys cheerleader
uniform and a blond wig. The Cowboys, said SI, not only kicked him out but
sued him--although they never followed through. In an NBA All-Star game,
Security guards discovered him shooting baskets as the teams warmed up. They
tossed him out--but to be honest he was caught every time, even though he
wore a variety of sports uniforms including a chicken suit. Bremen was just
64 when he died--probably laughing. R.I.P. |
August 11,
2011: |
| Apple's
iCloud launch now set for September
Robert
Iger, CEO of Walt Disney is one sharp gentleman. Here's what he said a couple
of months ago about Apple's oncoming iCloud: "If you can create your own
digital locker in the sky and everything you have bought (music, movies,
TV shows) exists in one place, you don't have to spend time endlessly searching.
It's a better user experience. There are just so many movies you can store
on your laptop." On Aug. 2, Charlie Sorrel of WIRED announced Apple's iCloud.com
website had gone live, and that beta versions of the iWork suite for iOS
and iPhoto had been made available. Apple calls the iCloud a "sync"service
because you can create or edit a photo or document on your iPhone, iPad,
Mac or Windows PC and it's automatically shuttled to any other device you've
chosen. And Charlie makes two other interesting comments. The first is, there
might never be a way to view your documents on the Web, and right now there's
no way to view your photos on iCloud.com. But he didn't seem so sure. I believe
you'll be able to do both fairly soon. As it stands now, iCloud is free,
and comes with 5GB storage. For $20 a year you get 10GB, $40 a year buys
you 20GB and $100 gives you 50GB. Charlie ends his story with a caution:
before you rush out and spend the extra money, remember iCloud's storage
quota doesn't include your photos, your iTunes music, your apps or your purchased
books. In fact, Charlie says, 5GB looks like more than enough for most people.
And I say, best thing you can do right now is get ready for the iCloud service
launch in September. And start preparing for new kinds of marketing, new
ways to sell, new relationships and new clients. |
August 22,
2011: |
| Testing
beats guessing; are gut feelings better?
Here
are some tips from my first book, Casino Marketing, published in 1994:
my close friend, the late Andy Byrne, told of a life insurance company that
tested two ads. The headline on one read, "Leave Money for Your Family After
You've Gone." The second headline read "Get Rid of Money Worries for Good."
Then Andy turned and asked, "Which one pulled best?" I'll give you the winner
in a moment, but the real hero of this story is the person who insisted on
testing instead of guessing. That always saves the company money. The winner
was the second headline, which pulled five times as many coupons as the first
headline. So $100,000 invested in the second ad, Andy pointed out, would
give you the same results as $500,000 invested in the first headline. Although
they were good friends, Andy wrote headlines that rivaled or beat David Ogilvy.
But Andy's personal favorite was an Ogilvy headline for Rolls Royce. It read,
"At 60 miles per hour in a Rolls Royce the loudest sound you hear is the
ticking of the electric clock." Later, Ogilvy met the Rolls chief engineer,
who frowned as if Ogilvy had revealed a military secret. As he stomped off
Ogilvy heard him mutter, "I've got to work on that damn clock." Another of
the fine headline writers was the late Bill Jayme. But Jayme was remembered
more for his attitudes on research than for his headlines. He called research,
"The art of making obscure that which is obvious." I agree. I'll take the
gut feeling born of experience over research any time--and I'll win more
than I'll lose. Remember Coca Cola? They did a mountain of research before
the changed the flavor. The real mission of research is to provide ammunition
for the creative process. Research alone doesn't bring people into casinos
and it sure can't make them gamble. The emphasis on technology has depersonalized
the business. The customers sense it. They want to be treated as human beings,
not as parts of a segment.
top |
|
July 1,
2011: |
| Stolen Painting
Found by Tree
As
a boy, I often traveled with my show business parents. They toured the country,
playing theaters, movie houses, lounges, fairs, whatever their booking agent
wanted. And every summer we hit the big cities. Seattle was always a two-week
stop--and I've never forgotten my first visit. Screaming headlines told us
a murderer was running loose. Twice the cops had him cornered. Twice he escaped.
After that second time the Post-Intelligencer's front page headline
shouted,"Police Elude Killer." We felt kind of silly laughing--but
we did. As I grew older I saw the famous Variety headline,"Sticks Nix
Hix Pix." Seems people in small towns (Sticks) no longer wanted (Nix)
corny films (Hix Pix). Then a few days ago the Wall Street Journal's page
3 banner read, "Colorado Out of Joint Over Pot Shops," a shot at the
state's medical marijuana dispensaries. So I dashed to my machine and punched
in a search for more funny (but true) headlines. In the Internet's Headline
Humor we find "Psychics Predict World Didn't End Yesterday." And in
AlphaDictionary.Com under the Columbia School of Journalism we discover,
"Dr. Ruth to Talk About Sex with Newspaper Editors," and "Police
Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers." Get into this sort of pastime
and you giggle the rest of the day at headlines such as, "Killer Sentenced
to Die for Second Time in 10 Years," and "Man Struck by Lightning
Faces Battery Charge." Then you run into, "Passing Wind Strands DC
Ferry Passengers," "Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim," "Drunk Drivers
Paid $1,000 in 1984," and "Milk Drinkers Are Turning to Powder."
Now here's another weird circumstance. The person in the newsroom who writes
a double-meaning headline such as "Teacher Strikes Idle Kids," sees
nothing funny about it. He knows exactly what it means. But (sigh) he's the
only one. And in conclusion, "Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury
Hung." |
July 11,
2011: |
| Damn good
banjo pickin' from an actor and comic
I'm
watching "A Capitol Fourth 2011" on the evening of the 4th of July. Everyone
knows it's the best show of the year, and strickly American. Every patriotic
song and stirring march you've ever heard. Stars from Broadway, singers,
dancers, composers--then those impossible fireworks. And of all things this
year--a Bluegrass band named Steep Canyon Rangers. Five guys in dark suits
and one guy whose hair was as white as his suit. Had a white banjo, too.
The minute they started to play I thought, who IS this guy? He didn't just
play the banjo--he assaulted it. His pickin' hand became a blur. He hit the
drone string like he was running for his life. He could take that banjo to
the middle east and stare down the Libyan army. Later, when the announcer
called him Steve, I realized the guy in the white suit was Steve Martin.
Yeah, the comedian, actor, author, playright, and producer. Two comedy albums
won him Grammy Awards; "The Crow: Five Songs for the Five-String Banjo,"
won a Grammy for Best Bluegrass Album; he starred in series of classic film
from "Little shop of Horrors" and "Father of the Bride" to "Bowfinger" and
"Bringing Down the House." He even co-hosted the Academy Awards. Your faithful
reporter played a little Bluegrass years ago. After listening to this man
I'd throw away my old banjo I (if I still had it). Okay, change of pace.
In 1956, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins and Elvis got together
to record the wildest jam session in the history of time. They called them
the "Million Dollar Quartet." It's a big hit on Broadway now, so naturally
they brought it on stage. Kelli O'Hara's magnificent voice, Josh Groban's
equally marvelous songs, Mathew Morrison of "Glee," Idol winner Jordin Sparks,
MC Jimmy Smits, Little Richard and a stageful of military bands closed it
out. What? You missed it? Don't ever do that again. |
July 22,
2011: |
| Dear Valued
Customer just makes me furious
If
I get one more letter that starts, "Dear Valued Customer," I'm going to rush
over to my machine and fire back my own letter. I'll start it something like
this: "You jerks. If I really was a 'valued' customer you'd call me by my
first name. Wake up. This is 2011. Take a look at your database. I'm in there
because I've done business with you for years and both my names were on your
envelope. Start making friends with your direct mail. That's the personal
edge we have over other advertising. If I get another DVC salutation you'll
never see me again. " Okay, I probably wouldn't send a letter like that.
But on second thought I might. White bread salutations are unsound because
the geniuses using them have no idea what's taken place in the direct mail
business. Same for "Dear John Romero." Would you ever start a personal letter
like that? Of course not. You just don't call friends by both names. All
right, maybe you would if you were a casino boss sending one of those
heartwarming letters telling them their lack of play has forced you to take
away all their comps. Using two names in the salutation also tells them you're
too damn busy to care if they come back to your joint or not. Now let's consider
what might happen if you had to get something in the mail today to a hot
new player list you'd just, ah, discovered. Then it would be okay to start
the letter with "Dear Slot Genius," "Dear Preferred Player," or some such.
But once you get the new list in your database, use the player's first name.
Send him a letter that welcomes him to your store. P.S. And be sure to thank
him.
top |
|
June 1,
2011: |
| New casino
slot offer: everything half price
Attention
casino marketers. The "daily-deal market," as AP calls it, is changing marketing
at warp speed. Better figure out a way to use it. Groupon, which started
the daily-deal, had about two million subscribers 18 months ago. Now they
have 85 million. A new D-D site named LivingSocial zoomed from 120,000
subscribers to 28 million. Mark Frank, a research guy from BIA/Kelsey, says
D-D revenue is growing much faster than overall e-commerce. What, you never
heard of D-D? Okay, listen up. Groupon becomes a partner with a small business
anywhere in the US. Their Web site fires out a deal a day to subscribers
in the partner area. Sometimes it's a half-price deal that last only a few
hours. Whatever it is, Groupon takes a 30 to 50 percent cut from the price
a customer pays. Business is so good they hire and train150 new employees
a month, says AP. Not bad, hmm? A pizza shop might offer a $12 pizza for
$4. Now wait a second. They're losing money on every $4 deal. Yeah, but the
place is filled with customers who buy other tasties at full price. Hey casinos!
You want to take a shot? AP asks, what if you had hotel rooms that were going
to sit empty anyway? I say, work up something based on those free $5 slot
play tickets that cost you only $2.50. Match play? Baccarat? Maybe. Caution:
don't give away too much stuff at half price or your customers will get used
to it. Big trouble. |
June 11,
2011: |
| Secret of
press releases: send 'em a story instead
Every
now and then, as I scan subject lines, I see some company trying to sell
"The Secret" of a good press release. But I never open it and read the copy.
Why? Because I've worked both sides of the street and I already know the
secret. My secret. The one that worked every time. As sports editor of the
Las Vegas Review-Journal for ten years, I saw plenty of press releases. And
in the 20 years I worked for the Sahara Las Vegas as marketing director,
I wrote plenty of them. My stuff for the Sahara always saw print. Editors
would call to thank me and tell me they always looked forward to my pieces.
Why? Most of the press releases that crossed their desks were filled with
syrupy praise for the company, or the owner. Mine told stories. I wrote them
like newspaper and magazine features. For a story about the Sahara's many
cash gifts to charities, I told about the night Buddy Hackett, a big Sahara
star, wrote a $3,000 personal check on the side of a grocery bag and handed
it to a dazzled younker who represented a Nevada Indian group. "Hey," said
Buddy, "you can write a check on anything. Just tell them to call me if there's
any problem." Of course, I worked the Sahara's largesse into the piece. On
sports pages, archery stories win little space. But my story about Joan Adams,
a gorgeous Sahara cocktail server who won the indoor archery title two months
after she took up the sport, scored big. Naturally, I slipped in how the
Sahara encouraged its employees to enter all sorts of events and helped them
become stars. When the Sahara held an outdoor rally for the Johnny Mann gang,
we accidentally released a thousand balloons into the McCarran Field flight
path. They missed the incoming planes by miles but I never mentioned that.
The balloons got Johnny terrific ink in the LV newspapers. Good stories always
run. "Press releases" usually irk the editors. |
June 22,
2011: |
| The Publicity
Department? You're out of style, fella
(A
tribute to the Sahara Las Vegas, which closed in May after 60 years.)When
I first went to work for the Sahara we didn't have a "marketing department."
We had an advertising and publicity department. We pumped out press releases
about as fast as we could type. The gorgeous girls in the Sahara chorus line
had their pictures splashed in every newspaper and magazine in the country.
We called them "The Most American Girls in the World," which didn't make
a lot of sense even in those days, but the editors ran everything we could
send them. Our MO was to check Chase's Calendar of Events so we always had
a reason for the girls in the picture. Kind of thin, but it worked. When
a new show opened, one of us would send reviews to the top entertainment
columnists in the nation, from Hollywood to New York. The next day we owned
the entertainment sections of all the major papers. But I wasn't satisfied.
As an ex-newspaper guy I thought "advertising and publicity" was old and
out of style. Besides, "advertising" meant "spend money." Around the early
70s I started to call myself the Marketing Director, which I hoped meant
"make money." We developed more special events to bring in big players, which
the casino loved. And I phased out "publicity." Now you can get a marketing
director on the phone. Ask for the Publicity Director and you're 40 years
out of style.
top |
|
May 1,
2011: |
| When cost
became zero, Nevada came in to help
Win
Cards (story at left) may be the first
promotion that weathered all casino budget cuts. The casino pays $5 a set
for the Win Cards--then sells them for $20 and makes a $15 profit. Next,
the casino gives the Win Cards buyer $30 in special chips that are generally
valued at half their face value--plus a "Dealer's Tip" coupon. (Of course,
the player must join the casino's player club.) So the casino has educated
its rookie players in the game (BJ, Craps or Roulette), created play with
the special chips, and didn't pay a dime for it. The Nevada Gaming Control
Board liked the program so well they set up special accounting procedures
to help casinos use it...when Ted and Pam were in in Puerto Rico to train
the staff of the Condado Plaza in the use of Win Cards, they showed up at
noon on Tuesday--as the casino manager wished. When no one came, Ted asked
him when training could begin. "Manana," replied the casino manager, which
Ted and Pam understood as "tomorrow." But no one showed the following day.
The casino manager again told them training would begin "manana." After some
probing, our two heroes discovered that "manana" in Puerto Rico also meant
"Not today." Final add: "More reasons casinos gave in the beginning for not
buying Win Cards. "All our customers already know how to play," and the kicker,
"We have plenty of table game players and don't need any more right
now." |
|
May 11,
2011: |
| What happened
to words? Only your reporter knows
Your
faithful reporter will be speaking at CasinoFest, in Tulsa, OK, later in
the month, along with a number of friends including John Acres and Prof.
Nelson Rose. My title, as you might suspect, will be, "What Happened to the
Written Word?" As a judge of direct mail for 10 years in the American Gaming
Association's annual "Voice" awards, I've seen personal letters fall away
to nothing--and I mean that literally. I haven't seen a single one entered
in the contest for the last three years. What used to be salesmanship in
print has become (in many cases) a single line that describes the offer.
And the invitations now cost $12 or more in the mail. Personal letters from
the General Manager, speaking one-to-one with his players, once mailed as
low as .35 cents. As we entered a new century, art pushed words out of sight.
Then type styles changed from Roman serif to the newest hard-to-read sans
serif faces such as Helvetica and Arial. Writing skills faded in favor of
handsome art, and letters apparently became too hard for many casinos to
write. So now I'm often asked, "What happened to the written word?" And I
wrote a speech that contains the answer. Maybe it's a new start for words.
I hope so. All of us need relief from the incoming barrage of unreadable
type and the dearth of readable words. |
May 22,
2011: |
| A comeback
for words? Sooner than you think
When
you think about it, the casino business is very personal. When you go to
your bank do you know the president? When you shop at a supermarket do you
know the manager? When you go to a restaurant, do you know the owner? In
most cases the answers are no. But when you play at a casino two or three
times you meet the Table Games bosses, the Slot Manager and maybe even the
General Manager if he roams the floor. And since it's your money on the tables
or flowing into the machines, you make it a point to know those people and
make friends of them. As a result we found personal letters from GMs working
wonders with casino customers, new and old, in the mid-80s through the 90s.
One-page letters, 2-page letters, even 4-page letters bound the customer
to the casino because they were written friend-to-friend, and not
company-to-audience, which is what many casinos still do. But the trend staggered
to a halt. Email chipped away at snail mail and it became easier to have
casino Web sites carry the offers. And although casinos still used the US
mail, the letters became shorter or were reduced in size and placed in
self-mailers. The personal feeling vanished. In 2010, for the 10th straight
year, I judged Direct Mail for the American Gaming Association. I looked
at 130 entries and not one contained a personal letter--and few said anything
at all about the customer. The typical format was an invitation splashed
with gold foil and blind embossing. Or a poster as big as an open newspaper.
Or a toy that buzzed and hummed as you pressed the buttons. Will words ever
make a comeback? Yes, and sooner than you may think. (Taken from my speech
entitled What Ever Happened to the Written Word? at CasinoFest in
the Hard Rock Casino at Tulsa, OK, earlier this month)
top |
|
April 1,
2011: |
| Is reading
really dead? Entrepreneurs say no
How
many times have you heard someone say, "Nobody reads anymore?" Too many casino
marketers have been paralyzed by those three words, and there are plenty
of arguments now that seem to back up this mercurial statement. But the words
are false, because people DO read--as long as it hits their self-interest.
Who are the entrepreneurs of our time? Are they isolated men and women who
work alone to produce societal changes? Or are they readers of novels and
nonfiction and scientific advances and business breakthroughs and cultural
shifts that give them their often brilliant ideas? I'll go with the latter.
In my experience, the best slot managers and slot marketers are readers.
They know what's happening in the industry and they know what's happening
in America. You can compare their personal guesses with a solid research
study and both will come up with the same answer almost every time. They
have a business sense they'll soon need--because they read. I recommend
it. |
April 11,
2011: |
| Should a
menu be fun? It worked for the quiche
A
few days ago the Denver Post Food Section burst forth with a full page story
named "Consider the Menu." A sub-headline read,"A well-written menu is a
pleasure to peruse. A poor one, agony." A little overblown, I thought, but
cute. The story went on to quote Jonathan Waxman, chef at one of New York's
famous restaurants. "People want to have fun these days," Waxman said. "Money
is precious. I think menus have to reflect that. You want to feel a connection
to the kitchen." I liked the part about fun because it took me back to the
late 80s and a menu I wrote for my first client--Lady Luck in downtown Las
Vegas. The casino had opened a new gourmet room but business wasn't exactly
sensational, so the GM asked for my advice. "The menu is terrible," I told
him, "not the food--the writing." Okay, the GM said, so write us a new one.
The chef thought it was a fine idea, even when I started to ask for the food
cost of every item on his menu. Turned out his quiche was lowest. So I wrote
about 75 words on it. I said it was so good we had to keep it away from
Californians, because they'd mob the place. I warned the clientele if they
ordered the quiche they had to pledge never to tell anyone from California
about it. I told them the waiter would ask for the pledge in writing before
he delivered the quiche. Then I wrote the pledge in fractured lawyer lingo.
Bottom line: the quiche became a best-seller, the customers all wanted to
keep the pledge they signed, and the chef turned into a believer. I wrote
humorous stuff for about a dozen more items. Prices on the menu all went
up. Hey, that Waxman guy was right. People do want to have fun. |
April 22,
2011: |
| The customer's
big question deserves a quick answer
"What's
the deal, and what's in it for me?" When you send a customer or a prospect
a piece of direct mail, that's exactly what's he's thinking as he opens it.
If you've answered his question in your first paragraph (the lead), you have
a chance to land him. If that nine-word question goes unanswered for three
or four paragraphs, your chances to tempt him into your store go from good
to nonexistent. It's the main reason why professional direct mail writers
advise you to, "Fire your big guns first." Is that hard to understand? Of
course not. But to many casinos it seems to be one of those those tactics
that are too good to be true, and they clomp along relying on adjectives
to make their rooms, shows and restaurants appeal to customers. Yet adjectives
are like barnacles; they drag down the story. And used often they drive off
the customers. Years ago I developed a simple plan to entice customers to
read my letters from beginning to end. How? Every paragraph was about the
customer and the benefits waiting for him at the XYZ Casino. One of my first
leads read, "Your plane touches down in Las Vegas. As you walk out of the
terminal a private limousine pulls up. It's for you." This was a word picture
every casino customer understood, a simple yet powerful appeal that alerted
his vanity and pulled him into the letter. From that lead on, every paragraph
contained a benefit. To get your letters read, nothing is more powerful than
answering that first question quickly, then piling on the benefits. P.S.
A separate VIP line at the coffee shop for houseguests only is a feature.
The benefit is, they go right to their tables with no waiting while everyone
else stands jn line.
top |
|
March 1,
2011: |
| Has casino
mail slipped? A writer says it's true
Has
the effectiveness of direct mail slipped in the casino business? I'd say
yes--and probably much more than you realize. In small but steady spurts
it has backed away from its leadership position and wandered into no-man's
land. The use of letters as invitations has wasted away to almost nothing.
At its peak, well-written one or two-page letters brought in business because
the general managers of many properties found speaking one-on-one to their
customers (and getting mail in return) was such a delight. But the problem
has always been in the wording. Few GMs wrote their own letters. Why, when
someone in their marketing department could do it? The answer to that one
lay in percentage of response. If you once reached double figures and now
you struggle to hit three or four percent, better check your letter writer.
I once wrote a column I named, "What direct mail can't do." Although I wrote
hundreds of columns devoted to direct mail, the letters and email that came
to me from that one were wakeup calls. Many came from young people, new to
the casino business, whose writing careers now headed south. Their GMs, in
many cases, told them not to write more than a page. In real time, you don't
write for a set number of pages; you write until you cover all the benefits
of the offer--and you keep writing until you've put every one of them on
display. When I went into my own business I had so many calls for letters
it become a full time job. But as the years sailed by I saw the power of
letters diminish. Why, I asked myself, when letters worked so well for me?
I didn't much care for the only answer I could find--and I'll give you the
bad news when I next post on March 11. |
March 11,
2011: |
| Readers,
listeners, viewers are ignored by image ads
When
Alec Benn wrote The 27 Most Common Mistakes in Advertising thirty three years
ago, he wrote a book for the ages. I doubt if you can find a copy of this
work today because what Benn pointed out as "dreadfully wrong" in 1978, now
seems to be perfectly correct. People are born self-centered, Benn says.
Only training by parents, schools and experience make them appear less
self-centered than they are. It's the reason, he says, why politicians and
salespersons make a point of remembering people's names. And it's the reason
why beauty aid advertising is often more effective when it appeals to a woman's
love of herself, rather than the benefits of appearing attractive to a man.
Yet we still see advertising, Benn argues, that talks about the product,
the service or the company instead of talking about the reader, viewer or
listener. Time and again, image advertisements include the phrase, "We're
proud of our..." Then he delivers the knockout: "It is difficult to understand
how such language gets into print. Corporate image advertisers, as a class,
are the worst offenders because most of their ads are not objectively measured.
There's always the danger that the agency will submit ads featuring the
advertiser instead of the prospective user of the product or service." An
even larger mistake, Benn tells us, is using a pun in the headline. "It's
the lowest form of humor," he growls. And I agree with him. |
March 22,
2011: |
| Do you send
a letter with your invitation?
Bob
Stone wrote Successful Direct Marketing Methods in 1979, and for a decade
no one in the mailing business would make move without consulting it. It
was one of the first books I bought for my personal direct marketing library,
which now stands at 83. Bob didn't just give you one format for writing a
mailing package. He gave you ten. And buried in that ten was one named "The
Invitation Format." Bob didn't knock the format, but said it worked best
for publishers, club memberships and credit card solicitations. Then he added
this. "The outside of the invitation usually carries a letter explaining
the offer." A skilled direct marketing pro would say, "Of course." But as
far as I can find in today's gaming mailings, that never happens. Sure, there's
an invitation inside that invites you to a promotion or event and lays $100,000
on some fortunate winner. Pretty good, but what about all the mid-size to
small promotions you put together month after month every year? Is a letter
explaining the offer (or offers) in the mailing package, too? The answer,
for most casinos, is "No." That's really too bad. "Win a new car!" shout
some casino invitations. But there's never a mouth-watering letter riding
along to point out every benefit that comes with it. So those casinos never
really close the deal, never drive in the borderline prospects, and never
get the extra revenue that, at year's end, can add up to so much.
top |
|
February 1,
2011: |
| A famous
adman delivers a stunning speech on sales
I
have a copy of the most powerful speech ever given by an advertising guy.
Who else except David Ogilvy? Most in the modern ad community have never
heard of Ogilvy, who died before the Facebooks and Twitters and Mobiles were
born. And many of those who worked in the same profession and knew him well
avoided him because he spoke his mind--often at them. He was a genial man
whose friends called him D.O., but he never failed to skewer those who thought
it was below them to embrace direct marketing. On the occasion of his speech,
he spoke to a group of direct marketers in Paris about his commitment to
sell--or else. Some excerpts from his speech that attacked general advertising:
"We who work in Direct do not regard advertising as an art form. Our clients
don't give a damn whether we win awards at Cannes. They pay us to sell their
products--nothing else...when you Generalists write an ad, you want everyone
to congratulate you on your "creativity." When we write a direct mail package
we want people to order the product...when your commercials appear on television
you have no means of knowing whether they sell anything. We in Direct Marketing
know, to a penny, how many products we sell with each ad...your favorite
music is the applause of your fellow art directors. Our favorite music is
the ring of the cash register." Just imagine a full hour of this. |
February 11,
2011: |
| First mailing
didn't work? Send the same thing again
The
late Andrew Byrne wrote such compelling direct mail they should have put
his biog on the letter in his mailing packages to give you a fighting chance.
And when you asked Andy a question he usually fired back with a solution
no one else has ever heard. For example, the first time I told him a mailing
I dropped didn't draw the response I predicted, his reply was "Mail the damn
thing again." I just stared at him. "It works even better," Andy said, "when
you're mailing to your own list of proven customers. And your followup mailing
costs you far less than the original mailing because it's the same art and
same printing run." I gave him a stare that said, "Are you kidding me?" Andy
threw up his arms and said, "Okay, put a new teaser on the envelope. Make
it say 'Second Notice,' or 'Last Chance.' Drop it about two weeks after your
first letter." Now I'm worried. I know he's not kidding but will my targets
realize I've sent them the same thing twice and think I've lost my mind?
Not a problem according to Andy. "Do you remember what you got in the mail
last week?" he said. Sure as hell, I didn't. "And one more thing," Andy said.
"The second mailing will draw substantial response and will increase response
from your first mailing as well." What could I do? my staff thought I'd been
on the sauce when our second identical mailing went out. Back came a steady
flow of acceptance letters from both mailings--just as Andy predicted. I've
used that tactic for years. It's never failed. |
February 22,
2011: |
| Want better
advertising? First, kill the adjectives
You
need customers and you're trying to write some selling copy that will have
them galloping into your casino to get the special new seafood dinner. So
the first thing you do, naturally, is probe your mind for all the adjectives
you can find that could possibly apply to the casino's new seafood dinner.
Your opening copy reads something like this: "Have you tried our magnificent
new seafood dinner? This breathtaking collection of luscious bay shrimp,
intriguing wild salmon, captivating Cape Cod sole and laudable west coast
scallops will make you quiver with anticipation. You can feel the excitement
rise as your inspired taste buds tremble." If there are a hundred ways to
describe a seafood dinner, what you've just read will be dead last on the
list. Adjectives are like the barnacles on the bottom of a ship that's been
at sea for years. They weigh down the message. There's a big gap between
telling and convincing and the more adjectives you use the larger it becomes.
If you want to sell you must first be warm and personal--in print as well
as in person. Your writing should speak of benefits, not claims, because
that's the only way you'll ever drive those customers in the door
top |
|
January 1,
2011: |
| A word to
win with, a word to lose with
Here's
a tip about a single word that can change the impact of an important sentence
in a piece of direct mail or in almost anything else you write. The word
is well known and it's part of everyone's vocabulary, but its power to motivate
and please is largely overlooked. The word is "really." I use this magic
amplifier in virtually every piece of direct mail I write. But there's a
drawback. It can be used only once per piece. To show you how it adds a punch,
which is stronger in the following examples? "I loved the necklace you sent,"
or "I really loved the necklace you sent." "I appreciate your interest in
our company," or "I really appreciate your interest in our company." Of course,
the word can amplify everything from doubt to weather. "Do you really expect
me to believe that?" "It's really a hot day." Use it to make an impression
right up front, or to close your letter. It really works. Now here's a word
to banish from your vocabulary. You see it in most casino direct mail, where
everything from valet parking to the buffet is called "exciting." I've seen
that overworked, empty word used up to four times in a one-page letter. And
really, there are much better words to describe the sensations that a casino
creates. They include "breathless," "thrilled," "captivated" and "inspiring."
Really. |
January 11,
2011: |
| Herschell
Gordon Lewis, the funniest adman ever
I've
always loved the sense of humor that made Herschell Gordon Lewis not only
a producer of grade B monster films, but also made him one of the most
knowledgeable admen in America. I couldn't wait to get his book, "On the
Art of Writing Copy," and the funny parts, sure enough, had me howling. In
one section he takes on "hucksterism," which he reports is the obnoxious
procedure of coattail riding behind a phrase, saying or slogan that has no
relationship to what's being sold. In one of the ads he shows, the headline
reads, "Square Feet for Lease." Jutting from the top of the ad are two square
(bare) feet."Ghastly!" wails Lewis. Another ad shows a woman and a hand holding
a revolver aimed directly between her eyes. The headline reads,"Get Rid of
that Deadly Hairstyle...don't play Russian Roulette with your hair." Lewis
comments, "Whoever told the writer of this ad he was clever had better steer
clear of IQ tests. It doesn't even show what it's supposed to, because Russian
Roulette would have the woman pointing the gun at her own head." A third
ad shows a man in a business suit about to shoot a basketball. The headline
reads, "Take Your Best Shot at a Mortgage with the Morsemere Mortgage Team."
Lewis called the ad, "a nonspecific buffoon approach." |
January 22,
2011: |
| Direct headlines
dominate, indirect headlines obscure
Some
advertising is so bland, so uninspired and so brain-numbing that it actually
murders the message it tries to deliver. The reason most ads fail usually
can be traced to the headline. But if you can take the 11-word sentence I'm
about to write and lock it into your mind, you'll never again write a miserable
ad. Deal? Then here's the sentence: "The headline is the most important single
element of any ad." Easy, right? And 100% true. To make this point in a seminar
to a large group of casino marketers in Las Vegas, I showed them ads displayed
against a large screen. The headline on the first ad read, "Run these guys
out of town." Behind the words came a cascade of currency. All bills bore
the likenesses of American presidents--the faces you expect to see on large
bills. The rest of the ad copy was too small to be easily read. I asked if
anyone in the audience knew what the ad was selling. No one had a clue. Then
I told the group the ad announced a Blackjack tournament in Las Vegas with
a $100,000 first prize. Assorted laughter and vacant stares followed. "Run
these guys out of town" obviously was a funny line to the art director who
created the ad. In direct marketing we call that an "indirect headline" because
it hides the message. A "direct headline" is four times as good. Too bad
the guy didn't know the 11-word line you've already memorized.
top |
|
December 1,
2010: |
| How a four-page
letter filled up a tournament
Dick
Hodgson was the first direct mail pro I'd ever met, and when I went to one
of his rare seminars in Las Vegas years ago I was already immersed in direct
marketing. To meet the guy whose copy had helped push DM into the marketing
mainstream was a rare treat times ten. I almost fell out of my chair when
he used one of my letters to make a point in his lecture. As he talked about
guidelines for sales letters I realized half the stuff I knew originated
with him. For example, I've been asked how long a letter should be. Dick's
answer was,"No such thing as a letter which is too long--just one that's
too boring." In that answer lies several truths. The role of the letter,
Dick said, was to answer all the questions the prospect needs to have answered
before he or she is willing to take the action requested. If you can answer
all those questions in one paragraph, stop there. Of course, if you're writing
to a high end player you can never answer everything in one paragraph. Sometimes
it takes two pages--sometimes more. The first client I ever had was about
to cancel a Blackjack tournament because only six people had responded to
his mailing. When we sat down to talk about it, I pressed him for benefits
his tournament offered to every player. After an hour I advised him not to
cancel. A day later I handed him a four-page letter. He stared at it for
a moment--fascinated. I could see the question coming. "Who's going to read
all this?" he said. "Everyone who receives it," I said. We sent the piece
a couple of days later and the acceptances poured in. The guy was overcome.
Our talk had netted me 18 benefits and I suggested 10 more. I used all of
them in the letter--from a comp newspaper at your door every morning of your
stay to a late checkout. Thank you, Mr. Hodgson. |
December 11,
2010: |
| Just what
is marketing? Tell them, sure beats me
Occasionally,
right out of the dark side of nowhere, someone will ask, "What is marketing?"
Of course, all of us in casino marketing are geniuses with ready answers
to such mundane questions--so we blurt out a few sentences we've never used
before. Sometimes the questioner gets it, and sometimes he doesn't. By then
we're out of sight. But I always liked a paragraph I read in Fundamentals
of Marketing, by a pair of college professors, O. C. Ferrell of Illinois
State, and William Pride, Texas A&M. Right away they make you read an
eight-line intro that winds up telling you there are many ways to define
marketing. But that's not quite answering the question, is it? They give
us several more definitions, and this is as close as they come to the casino
business: "Marketing is a total system of business activities designed to
plan, price, promote and distribute want-satisfying products and services
to present and potential customers." Now, you might think the profs would
like that one best, But no. They hate all of them. Finally, they give us
the one they like. Brace yourself. "Marketing consists of individual and
organizational activities aimed at facilitating and expediting exchanges
within a set of dynamic environmental forces." So like I said, just blurt
out a few words and get the hell out of sight a s fast as your legs can carry
you. Or tell them, "Sure beats me." |
December 22,
2010: |
| Mailing's
whopper dilemma; It's always 'We' versus 'You'
Ferd
Nauheim, an accomplished direct marketer, in l982 wrote a book he named "Letter
Perfect." I snapped it up for my marketing library. I never had the opportunity
to meet Ferd, but he was one terrific motivator and the book is filled with
pen marks I made as I whisked through it. Here's a sample: Henry Hoke, a
man Ferd calls one of the great pioneers of direct mail advertising, always
advised his clients to avoid something he named, "Wee-Wee-Itis." Said Hoke,
"if you fill your letters with 'We think you should,' or 'We hope you will,'
or 'We want you to try,' then you've picked up that fatal disease,
'Wee-Wee-Itis.' But other writers say too much stress has been given to the
"You" versus "We" problem, and a false impression has been created. Mailers
who read about it, they claim, think they have to cram their letters full
of the word "You." And here's the classic example, they say. A potential
customer wrote the following to a Chicago mail-order house: "Please send
me the watch on page 132 of your catalogue. If it's any good, I'll send a
check." The company fired back with this: "You tell us which watch on page
132 of what catalogue and send us your check. If it's any good, you'll get
your watch."
top |
|
November 1,
2010: |
| The Publicity
Department? You're out of style, fella
When
I first went to work for the Sahara on the Las Vegas Strip we didn't have
a marketing department. We had a publicity department. We pumped out press
releases about as fast as we could type. The gorgeous girls in the Sahara
chorus line had their pictures splashed in every newspaper and magazine in
the country. We called them "The Most American Girls in the World," which
didn't make a lot of sense even in those days, but the editors ran everything
we could send them. Our MO was to check Chase's Book of Days & Dates
(or something like that) so we always had a reason for the girls in the picture.
Kind of thin, but it worked. When a new show opened, one of us would send
a review to the top entertainment columnists in the nation, from Hollywood
to New York. The next day we owned the entertainment sections of all the
major papers. But when "marketing" gradually replaced "publicity," the pace
slowed. We had more events to bring in our Big Guys, but we phased out
"publicity." Now you can get a Marketing Director on the phone, but ask to
speak to the Publicity Director and you're 20 or 30 years out of style. The
computer changed everything. Too bad. |
November 11,
2010: |
| Who was
Warren Nelson? Better buy his book, man
What?
You've never heard of Warren Nelson? The man wrote "Always Bet on the Butcher,"
and here's a digest from the dust jacket that sums it up pretty well: "Nelson
got his start selling moonshine and running illegal games in Montana in the
early 1930s...he worked as a pit boss for Reno's Palace Club...he was hired
by Bill Harrah, left following a clash with the boss, and became a partner
in the Club Cal Neva in 1962." if you read his book you'll learn how to cheat
the house--and why you shouldn't try. You'll meet "shifty operators" and
casinos that "were running on the square." Plus, you discover how Nelson
joined the Marines in 1942, was stationed in San Francisco, and raced across
the Bay Bridge every evening when his workday ended to spend the rest of
the night dealing at the Twenty-One Club. Wild stuff, because you're "taken
on a remarkable eyewitness trip through a half century of the history and
the lore of casino gaming." Now here's a little kicker that always makes
me smile. Could Nelson have written a book all by himself? Nope, it took
dozens of oral interviews conducted by my friend and colleague, Ken Adams.
The book was published in 1994 by UNR, so there still may be copies around.
Get one. |
November 22,
2010: |
| Writing
a press release? Editors hate flapdoodle
Why
is it you can pick up some novels and read right through them? You can't
put the book down. Bet me it was filled with quotes--maybe even page after
page of them. Novel writers, those sneaky verb merchants, know quotes read
faster so they feed them to you in great bunches. Sometimes they make up
half of a novel. So if you're knocking out a press release a week and you
want someone to read the damn thing, try filling it with quotes. Just make
sure to avoid flapdoodle (quotes without substance). Not only will the city
editor hate it, he'll shout obscenities and spill his coffee as he hits the
delete key. And your general manager won't be too happy, either. But if you
make your quotes meaty and timely you might actually accomplish something.
Now there's a second part to the secret of making customers and prospects
read your stuff. Research has show that from high IQ to low IQ, people like
to receive information in the easiest possible form. They don't want to struggle
to read it; they don;t want to interpret anything; they don't want to play
guessing games. Do you have all that? Then get out there and pound out some
stuff they'll read. You might even get a raise. Naw.
top |
|
October 1,
2010: |
| How to
walk New York with the iPhone crowd
Writer
Conrad Kiechel had a wonderful lead paragraph on his story in the Wall Street
Journal headlined, "The Infuriating Smartphone Saunter." He wrote, "A menace
is stalking the streets of Manhattan--slowly." Then, keeping his sanity despite
the walkers strolling beside him as they jabber into their iPhones, Blackberries
and Androids, he categorized them. "Some," wrote Kiechel, "stand meekly at
street corners, mesmerized by the screens in their palms, and when the light
changes and others surge forward, they remain immobile, blocking those behind
them with purposive gait." He points out most everyone is on a collision
course with someone else on New York sidewalks, but with a multitude of retards,
accelerations and sidesteps they go their way untouched. Bravo, Kiechel.
For a long time I displayed the same sort of anxiety at the end of airline
trips when the plane reached the terminal and everyone stood. To a man and
woman they'd whip out their phones and begin talking. What can they be talking
about I wondered? So I listened. How do I state this? Gossip, unfailing
scuttlebutt laced with tattle and prate. Buoyed by my new sense of self,
I never listened again. |
October 11,
2010: |
| "Fracking"
has arrived; it's not what you think
Do
you use the words "frigging" and "freaking" in casual conversation? Kindly
purge them from your vocabulary. They show a complete lack of class; they
mark you as a teenage dummy, even if you're 40. I pass this on because a
new, and similar, word has just appeared. I can't find it in the dictionary,
but since the Wall Street Journal used it in a recent issue, it soon will
be. A Journal op-ed by Holman Jenkins bears the headline, "Americans (Sort
of) Love Fracking." In the piece we find the following: "Yep, the sound and
fury of the fracking debate is really just the noise of the fracking phenomenon
being domesticated." And again in the same story, "Neither party's Pennsylvania
gubernatorial candidate wants to stop fracking." Now here's why you'll look
like a practicing idiot if you link "fracking" to the two low-brow words
I used in the first sentence. "Fracking," according to Jenkins,"is hydraulic
fracturing with horizontal drilling...to release natural gas." So you could
say, with a straight face, "Fracking technology is advancing." It's a big
deal in upstate New York. I might have known. |
October 22,
2010: |
| to find
a Booty Reading, just look in the window
I
can always find casino marketing people who say print advertising is old
fashioned and out of style. People who dislike print usually are producing
TV spots or funny radio commercials and deep down they all think print is
pure Bolshoi. But print ads are still around, and now and then you see one
that hardly ruffled the budget and is beating the hell out of your $25,000
so-called hot TV spot. How do you know that? It's because you can track print
down to the penny with no problem if your ad contains a response device.
And sometimes, if you use just the right words, even newspapers as excellent
as the Wall Street Journal will run it for you free of charge. Can you do
that with TV or radio? Not a chance. So maybe that's why Levi Strauss, Lee
Jeans, and Gap's Old Navy brand use "irreverent language" to promote their
jeans. Levi's "Curve ID" brand runs an ad that reads, "All A- -es Were Not
Created Equal." It's in magazines, on billboards and in store windows. The
Journal quotes You Nguyen, Levi's head of women's merchandising and design,
with "No woman turns around in the mirror and says'My derriere is not as
perky as it should be." Therefore, "Curve ID" promises a number of fits for
a variety of bottoms. And Old Navy has a huge window ad headlined "Your Booty
Reading." Young people don't think any of the ads are offensive. As for
mothers...umm...it's a no.
top |
|
September 1,
2010: |
| Here's
the easy way to increase response
Seems
there's been a slight disconnect between most casino mailings and the pros
who write letters to make a living. I get casino mail that's often no more
than one or two large paragraphs, some of them up to nine lines long. The
letters I get from the NRA and from both political parties, for example,
are filled with paragraphs that seldom are more than three lines long. It's
just a pitch, you might say--so what's the difference? Okay, make a note.
The letters with three line paragraphs are reader friendly because they can
be scanned. Do you think customers and prospects actually read everything
you send? Some may, but the huge majority scan because short paragraphs make
it easy. Long paragraphs are not only unfriendly to the reader, they incite
your brain. And your brain immediately sends you a message such as, "Ugh.
Too big to read. Pass on this one." So if you're a casino mailer asking for
business you should be able to increase response just by killing those monster
paragraphs. But don't stop there. Kill everything that's unfriendly to readers.
And that includes type style, paragraphs in capital letters, hard-to-understand
words, the fancy reverse-outs that some art directors love and anything else
that makes the customer or prospect frown, squint, grimace or or shake his
head. |
September 11,
2010: |
| Listening
to customers, or just asking questions?
More
and more I see articles in marketing publications that point out the importance
of listening to your customers--as if the writer just discovered it. And
maybe he did. I think most of us in casino marketing learn that pretty early,
but sometimes listening to a customer is as boring as salt. You get an earful
of the obvious. Now and then you meet a $15,000 dollar guy with a really
good idea and you make a note of it. And you promptly lose it. But you really
can learn "from" your customer (I prefer "from" over "listening") if you
control the conversation. To do that, always start your "listening" with
questions. Maybe ask something you'd really like to know such as, "You're
here all the time. Why do you come to our casino instead of our competition
down the street?" If you praise his answer, he'll be flattered. So ask another
question, and another. You learn three times as much from your own questions
as you would from just listening to the customer babble on. But if he wants
to babble and it sounds interesting, then give him room. But stay in charge
of the conversation. The customer is still king--but many don't realize it.
There are some casinos, I imagine, that send customers a survey and make
decisions based on the answers. But one-on-one is far better because you
make the customer a friend who'll never forget you--even if you learn
nothing. |
September 22,
2010: |
| What is
"comprehension?" Does it mean anything?
Almost
every time I bring up " reading comprehension" to casino marketing directors,
they nod their heads and struggle valiantly not to yawn. Hey, I don't blame
them. It's not exactly a sexy topic--which may be why nobody seems to give
a damn about it. But if you saw as much direct mail as I do every month,
I wouldn't have to preach this stuff. The fact is, most casinos just send
their customers a "take it or leave it" offer, assuming that's all they need
to draw a crowd. And even then, the offer is usually submerged in garish
art that invariably features reverse outs and the sterile stick letters of
sans serif type. If you do the least bit of study in reading comprehension,
you'll discover studies that show body copy with serif type scores 67% in
"Good" comprehension. Copy with sans serif type scores 12% in "Good"
comprehension. These stats come from Colin Wheildon's five-year study aptly
named, "Communicating, or Just Making Pretty Shapes." I don't know of another
study that can touch it, but you can still find passionate arguments favoring
Sans Serif. And everything you see in casino invitations these days is written
in sans serif, as if it's been proven to guarantee the best results. I talk
to marketing people who say they're satisfied with the response their direct
mail draws. I usually ask if they've tested. The answer is generally "Not
yet."
top |
|
August 1,
2010: |
| Forget
one-way mail; make it a dialogue
Direct
marketers such as your faithful reporter always talk about "creating a dialogue"
with their customers. But true dialogues don't happen that often. Do you
write personal letters back to your bank, your insurance company, your credit
card company, your car dealer, your airline? No. You buy or you don't buy
and that's the end of it. But the casino business is different. We're like
the corner grocery store used to be. We know our best customers by name,
know what they'll buy and won't buy. We know how often they come and how
much they'll spend. And unlike most companies, we have the opportunity to
meet them face-to-face every time they show. But practically all of the casino
direct mail I see looks on customers as "consumers," and not as friends.
It hawks an offer instead of holding out a hand. One-way mail that says,
"Here's the offer, take it or leave it, see you later," might make some sales
but it gives up the relationship without even trying. Do you want a dialogue?
Then your mail should always do double duty. As it makes a sale it should
cement the relationship. If you're not corresponding with your players on
a personal level, you're losing half the value of your mail. (Parts of this
were taken from my first book, Casino Marketing.) |
August 11,
2010: |
| Game confusion
abounds; learn from the customers
When
I served as Marketing Director of Del Webb's Sahara on the Las Vegas Strip
in the 70s, some bright guy came by trying to sell us a lobby kiosk. Said
he'd give us a free trial. So I came up with several questions, trying to
find out exactly how much the customers knew about the Sahara and about gambling.
In one section I asked what was the most confusing thing about the Sahara.
My questions included how to get a suit pressed, how to get your room changed
to a better one, how to make a show reservation, how would you grade the
coffee shop food--things like that. At the bottom, just for fun, I put "How
to gamble." You guessed it. Just under 80% said the most confusing thing
about the Sahara was how to gamble. The casino manager didn't believe it
when I showed him the results. Just shook his head. I remembered all this
when I read one of Goulet"s sections entitled, "Do not understand game played."
His well-researched answer: Casinos have conditioned players to wager max
coin; players believe the only way to win is with max. They quickly run through
their gaming budget; time on device is minimized; knowledge of results is
lacking; players are dissatisfied; as a result they seek alternatives, gaming
and non-gaming, to casino gambling. The tip: Don't learn "about" your customers.
Learn "from" them. |
August 22,
2010: |
| Want to
be a speaker? This book can help you
"The
Great Brain Robbery" was written in l980 by a couple of pals of mine named
Ray Considine and Murray Raphel. There's still nothing like it around. Pick
up this book, turn to any page and start reading. You'll learn something.
So I closed my eyes and picked a page, No. 87, and the first line that hit
me was, "Force yourself to listen." The authors suggest this when you're
at a conference and listening to a speaker because, as they write, "A phrase,
a fact may suddenly make sense to you. And you can use it at some future
date. Or even a gesture, a stance, a pause. The way speakers handle their
bodies is a language." If you're a speaker, they insist you, "look people
in the eyes, work your entire audience and invent imaginative, exciting or
intriguing titles. "Here are some dandies," they write, "that will bring
the flock in." And we find titles such as,"The Wages of Sin is Aaaughh!"
or "Will the Real God Please Step Forward," or "How to Sin and Enjoy It."
Above all, they write, are the words you use. "Select them," they caution.
"Slave over them, steal them from other speakers. Each word tells its own
story." As a casino marketer it's easy to become known for your speaking
because there are so few of you. And look how much you've learned in just
one paragraph.
top |
|
July 1,
2010: |
| Ogilvy's
famous '15' in the Hathaway ad
Imagine
you're writing an ad about men's shirts. You'd want to point out as many
benefits as you could find, right? For those who sometimes ask me to define
a benefit, an answer from the master, the late David Ogilvy. In his original
eye-patch ad copy for Hathaway Shirts he found 15 benefits. Read and be amazed:
not an ordinary, mass-produced shirt...wears years longer...collars make
you look younger and more distinguished...more comfortable because it's tailored
more generously...longer tails so they stay in your trousers...Mother of
Pearl buttons...antebellum elegance in the stitching...fabrics from all over
the world...impeccable tailoring gives a wearer quiet satisfaction...made
by dedicated small-town craftsmen...120 years of fine shirtmaking
tradition...carried by better stores everywhere...affordable price
range...growing in popularity...phone (number) for the name of your nearest
Hathaway store. I've talked to many advertising execs who think the eye-patch
on the distinguished model made the ad work. Wrong. The benefits you've just
read sold the shirts. |
July 11,
2010: |
| Pray for
the Post Office or lose the written word
It's
bad enough for the Post Office to wail about the billions they stand to lose
this year, threaten to cancel weekend deliveries, and call for another price
hike on stamps. Sounds like they're desperate--and they are. Every year they
creep closer to caving in. There's even been talk about privatizing the mail.
Hey, I don't doubt their problems for a second, but have you paused to realize
what might happen to casino direct mail if the Postal Service goes under?
My answer to that is "Not much--at first." You'd probably step up your email,
rely more on the Social Media and save money on addressing and mailing. But
you'd gradually lose the power of the written word. You simply can't romance
your customers on the Internet the way you can with a personal letter that's
loaded with benefits and can emphasize the power of exclusivity. Now here's
the funny part. Most casinos don't send personal letters any more--and the
copy in the letters they do send is awful. I'm not sure how or why that happened,
but my instinct tells me many casino marketers find letters that sell are
just too hard to write. Kind of sad, don't you think? Pray for the Post Office
just the same. We sure as hell need it |
July 22,
2010: |
| Type battle
still hot but serif faces lead
"Magazine
editors and art directors," writes Colin Wheildon in his Communication, or
Just Making Pretty Shapes, "argue that sans serif body type is clean, uncluttered
and attractive--and so it is." Wheildon then goes on to destroy the myth
of sans serif as a worthwhile type face for body copy. "They also argue that
difficulties with reading comprehension will pass as people become more and
more used to seeing and reading sans serif. People will grow to live with
it and it will soon become comprehensible to all, and all will love it. This
is nonsense. It's like saying instead of feeding your children Wheaties,
you should feed them wood shavings because they'll get used to them and in
time will learn to love them." Wheildon then reveals the results of his five-year
study of reading comprehension. Layouts with serif (Roman) type faces scored
67% comprehension, while layouts with sans serif type faces scored just 12%
comprehension. Despite such evidence, sans serif type is used in virtually
every print ad. But newspapers and books, at least, are still printed in
Roman faces. I like a few sans serif faces for headlines--as long as they're
in 18-point or larger. But as body copy--never.
top |
|
June 1,
2010: |
| The opening
is key: read on or toss it?
I've
written thousands of letters for my clients since I discovered the power
of Direct Marketing--and in each of them I spent more time on the lead paragraph
than I spent on the rest of the piece. It's the most important two or three
lines in the letter (or email) because it's the moment when the reader decides
to read on or toss it. The safest and most productive leads in casino mail
give the reader a benefit or an outstanding promise. But sometimes a question
lead, for example, can be just as effective. In the book, Words That Sell,
author Richard Bayan offers 40 starters including, "Did you ever ask yourself..."
and "Wouldn't you like to..." The strength of starters such as these is in
the casual, person-to-person avenues they can open. Bayan also suggests statement
starters such as, "Today, more than ever..." and " Believe it or not..."
Or even opening with challenges such as, "Join the small handful of people
who..." Only the writer can make such lead paragraph decisions, so keep writing
and rewriting until your lead is perfect. Letters must lure readers in, then
sell them. Or else. |
June 11,
2010: |
| Graphics,
not words, capture casino mail
In
a recent survey of Business-to-Business marketers done by Target Marketing
magazine, we find content marketing and copywriting voted as the two most
valuable skills. Graphic design ranked fourth. Let's contrast that with today's
casino mail, which apparently ranks graphic design first and copywriting
dead last. There is no persuasion in modern casino mail, no incitement, no
seduction, no tantalizing words that point out the benefits of the offer.
In modern casino mail the headline on the invitation is the offer. That's
it. The carriers (envelopes, boxes and tubes) the invitation itself and the
graphics with gold foil and blind embossing cost up to double digits. Inside,
you find the name of the party or event, date, how to confirm, the free stuff
you'll get, and little else. For that kind of mailing you really don't need
a writer. Just do it yourself. I'd like to find a casino that wants to pour
its heart into a letter that relies on benefits, the sizzle of the steak
for dinner, the oaken taste of the Cabernet, the luxury of triple sheeting,
the delightful faces of its employees and all the other small perks that
together say to the customer, "You are the most important person in our casino."
I'd write that letter free, fold it twice, and send it in a No.10 envelope.
Just imagine--in the mail for less than a dollar, and probably more effective
than the fancy packages that cost ten times that much. |
June 22,
2010: |
| A TV in
the grocery rankles your reporter
Congratulations.
Your local supermarket will be soon be displaying television ads for your
viewing pleasure. It's in a test period now at stores in Maryland and Virginia,
and the company that developed this new way to make shopping glorious is
taking no chances. The TV screens will be "Near or in front of the products
advertised in the commercials," a spokesman said. The company chairman said,
"It's a lot of moving parts. Everything has to work, and work to commercial
standards." I'm not sure what that means. Are you? But maybe this little
face to face venture with the shoppers is just what television needs. At
its best, it could show TV producers how to sell something. The silliness
that passes for commercials these days is teaching a generation that funny
is good and persuasion bad. Just because you laugh at a commercial and even
remember it doesn't mean it's selling. It just means it's silly. But how
do you make a soap commercial funny? Never mind. My bet is--they'll find
a way, and this time the silly stuff may pay off because the product in just
inches away.. A third spokesman for the new TV company said,"We're going
to learn a lot." Brace yourself.
top |
|
May 1,
2010: |
| A neat
magazine ad makes corporate case
You've
read me knocking corporate advertising. That's because most of it is "hash,"
to use the quaint description coined by David Ogilvy. And the reason it's
hash is because it's usually silly stuff the agency has always wanted to
do to impress other agencies. They adapt it to fit a client who doesn't know
any better. But listen to the copy make the case for corporate advertising
come alive in this McGraw-Hill Magazines print ad: Art shows a dejected gentleman
slumped in an office chair, his fingers crossed and a frown on his face.
The copy reads,"I don't know who you are, I don't know your company, I don't
know you company's product, I don't know what your company stands for, I
don't know your company's customers, I don't know your company's record,
I don't know your company's reputation, Now, what was it you wanted to sell
me? Moral: Sales start before your salesman calls--with business publication
advertising." Very professional stuff. |
May 11,
2010: |
| Do ad writers
read? Doesn't look like it
What
have we learned about advertising in the last 27 years. Not much. The year
1983 marked publication of "Ogilvy in Advertising," certainly one of the
best books ever written on advertising. One of his comments was the simple
fact that people in advertising refuse to learn the rudiments of the craft.
Millions are spent, Ogilvy said, but next to nothing in learned. We know,
for example, that sans serif type, and reversed out type (white letters on
a black background) are hard to read. Yet those two worthless styles now
predominate. Ad agencies keep making the same mistakes and clients don't
seem to mind. Years ago George Gallup and other researchers carefully pointed
out mistakes that wasted client money. But agencies that once embraced the
power of research now couldn't care less. What caused such a ridiculous
situation? Ogilvy once asked a copywriter how many books on advertising he
had read. The writer said none--because he preferred to rely on his own
intuition. And so we arrive at 2010. |
May 22,
2010: |
| Selling
the product is not the objective
My
pal Jeffrey Dobkin, author of Uncommon Marketing Techniques, often uses personal
experience to show you how to sell in this jewel that should be in every
direct marketer's bookcase. I guarantee you a smile in every chapter. In
one, he's dealing with the owner of a successful, yet floundering, real estate
company. The client is distant. After 50 years of selling homes he wonders
what Jeffrey can do for him. So Jeffrey starts by asking for the objective
of an expensive, one-third page ad the client runs regularly. "To sell houses,"
the client replies. How about the purpose of the listings inside the ad?
"To sell houses," the client repeats. Jeffrey concedes the client is partly
right, but tells him the objective of the ad is not to sell a house. No one,
he tells the client, sees a four-line listing and buys a house. The objective
of an ad is generally not to sell the product. The objective is to generate
phone calls. So Jeff throws a handful of new lines in the ad--such as "Call
now," "Call for an immediate appointment," and "For information call." The
client's phone calls tripled the first week. Any questions? The book has
been around since 1998, but you can still get it with a call to Danielle
Adams Publishers at 610-642-1000. And you'll thank me.
top |
|
April 1,
2010: |
| The wearable
computer may challenge the iPad
Thinking
of buying one of those Apple iPads? I've read they start at more than $400.
But like everything else that prices out half the buyers in the beginning,
they'll eventually get within range. In the meantime, Microsoft says it will
release its own version named "Courier," and a lower priced Fujitsu product
(also named iPad) has been on the market since 2002. I'm not advising you
to buy anything, but I'm sold on the "big pad" concept, mostly because of
the trouble I have trying to navigate the numbers and letters on my current
cell phone. Clumsy-fingered people of the world, unite. And there's another
good reason to hold off until the suits and claims of the various companies
are settled. Yes, my friends, it's the "Wearable Computer," and don't laugh.
Apple reportedly has hired wearable-computer expert Richard DeVaul, a Ph.D
of the MIT Media Lab. The Wall Street Journal says DeVaul is best known for
an earlier experiment named "Memory Glasses," tiny computer displays mounted
on eyeglasses. Save your money |
April 11,
2010: |
| Partnering
with USPS? Could be for mailers
It's
no secret the US Postal Service is in terrible shape and trying everything
from ending Saturday deliveries to partnering with private companies. Did
I say "partnering?" That's a damn good idea. But the the way they announced
it makes it sound like a fishing trip. They asked interested parties to respond
by April 23, but added the request is for "market research and planning purposes
only, and is not an RFP," whatever that is. They should have done that before
they asked for questions from the small to medium-sized "enterprises" they
say they're looking for. Instead, we're told the USPS wants details on how
it could "enable access to a comprehensive, end-to-end, online direct mail
solution." It's kind of obvious they want to cut costs by handling us online.
Maybe they can, and it might be better for casino mailers in particular.
Okay, here's a start. Drop Saturday deliveries as suggested, save a ton of
money and lower the price of stamps. |
April 22,
2010: |
| The hidden
power Of personal letters
I
don't know how many letters from customers hit your general manager's desk
each day. But I do know the personal letters I've written over the years
for various GMs bring in a steady flow of thank-you replies. When a customer
writes back to the GM to congratulate him, or to praise him, the writer should
get a symbol next to his or her name in the database. It's as close to a
customer for life as you'll ever get. You may speak to your customers in
a variety of online formats from email to Social Media, but they're always
delivered from your computer to theirs. Recipients instinctively know such
messages can be sent to thousands, and no customer sees it as a special
individual message--just for her. Direct mail costs more, but gives you several
advantages. With mail's high tech wizardry, you can send 5,000 identical
letters and each will look, read and feel like an individual personal letter.
That's a special feeling you can't get from a computer--and it's why the
personal tone I work into my letters is still in demand, particularly to
your high end players.
top |
|
March 1,
2010: |
| Things
always change: ignore it at your peril
The
USA-GM car company has ditched the Hummer. A Silicon Valley start-up claims
a cheaper way to generate electricity. And Social Networks, says an online
newsletter, may become the new mass media. So here's the tip: nothing stays
the same, Of course, you've heard it before. It's just easier to pretend
change is something that happens to others, but not to you. For example,
the USA-GM car company sold more than 71,000 Hummers in 2006. Hey! Hummers
looked like the company's best annuity until,.um, 2009, when the Army stopped
buying, the Chinese pulled out of a sale and the USA-GM car company sold
just 9,046. As for the start-up solving the energy problem, wait until they
sell one of these doodads. And as for Social Networks prevailing, picture
a landscape of 150 million people sitting at their computers 10 hours a day,
writing one-sentence messages to each other or exchanging photos. It can
get the word around fast, but that's not living. It's dying. |
March 11,
2010: |
| Wow! A
new computer; the iMac has arrived
I
just bought a new computer. It's an iMac, and a beauty, But it's mysterious,
too, as if the designers deliberately threw in lots of little changes to
show you who's boss. I've never used anything but Macs. Bought my first one
in the 80s. They've all been easy to use until this one. My old Mac ran almost
perfectly for 12 years and the mistake I made was keeping it too long. Little
things that were so easy on my old Mac are double complicated on my new one.
Take the print command for example. When you hit "print" on my old Mac a
box appears allowing you to print "all" or giving you the option of printing
one or more. Neat. If I'm working on a book and I've written 90 pages I can
print all 90 or just the three pages I found with errors. Don't have that
choice on my new Mac. Okay, I'm calling Apple tomorrow--but why should I
have to suffer? I've come to the conclusion the company revises all its new
machines to please the techies. But I'm a writer. I'll never need half the
stuff on my new iMac. But I'll keep it. "With all your faults I love you
still." Hum along if you can. |
March 22,
2010: |
| The three
key points for a winning ad
Some
advertising agency creatives think a colorful, well-written ad is an effective
ad. Too bad. Let?s look at some of the details that ads must have if they
are to sell anything--which, after all, is the purpose of advertising: (1)
The headline must be composed of benefits, of promises or of both. Take
´Magazines are immersive,¡ which the big five publishers use in
their first ad series. The big five publishers may love it, but it has neither
benefits or promises. Never forget--the headline is the most important single
element of any ad. (2) Never try to make ads that appeal to the
´readers¡ of a magazine. Aim only at those readers who want and
need your product or service. Nobody else counts. (3) Always use a response
device such as a coupon or a toll free 800 number. That way you get every
reply, which is the only way to measure effectiveness. Summing up: If your
ad is filled with benefits and promises, if it?s created only for those who
are current or potential customers, and if it contains a response device
that lets your prospects communicate directly with you--congratulations.
You?ll never be fooled again. Would the big five publishers be better off
speaking this way? Only a test would tell.
top |
|
February 1,
2010: |
| "Obamanough
already" say college wordsmiths
Could
Prof. William Strunk, Jr., the original author of "Elements of Style," handle
today's English? I doubt it. He'd probably leave it to the word doctors at
Lake Superior State University of Michigan. Last month these guardians of
the language issued their 35th annual list of terms that deserve to be banned.
Make sure you use none of the following: Heading the list we find "shovel-ready,'
which come to think of it could come only from Washington, a city that leads
the world in fraudulent snippets of speech. Also blacklisted were "infriended,"
as in "He made me so mad I unfriended him on Facebook," also "sexting,"
"tweeting," "retweeting," "teachable moment," "toxic assets," "transparency,"
"czar" and "stimulus that's too big to fail." In the overused category we
find "Omabacare" and "Obamanomics." " We say Obamanough already," said the
Lake Superior State wordsmiths. |
February 11,
2010: |
| Too bad.
Even the pros can't tell it's nonsense
If
you're involved in the advertising and marketing business, here's the best
tip I can give you: buy some books by Jeffrey Dobkin, Herschel Gordon Lewis,
David Ogilvy, Theodore Levitt, Ray Jutkins, Ries & Trout, and either
of my books blatantly displayed just below. Inside any of them you'll find
the purpose of advertising. Ogilvy, a direct marketer, summed it up in four
words: "We sell, or else." With all of us, sales come first. And none of
us write ads to "entertain" the viewer or reader at the expense of benefits.
Yet in one grotesque, unimaginable day, the ad business is turned upside
down. Madness reigns on Super Bowl Sunday. Even with prices as high as three
million for 30-second spots, the big majority of sponsors pay the money gleefully
and direct their agencies to make the silliest ads possible. And the following
day, critics in all forms of media announce their favorites. The Denver Post
newspaper, for example, asked admen and college marketing professors to give
their opinions. Replies such as "enchanting effects," "entertain before you
sell," and "all fun and giggles" burst forth from those who are the ad pros
of our time. Too bad. The next generation of advertising pros hears the adulation
and doesn't realize it's nonsense. |
February 22,
2010: |
| Direct
leads a charge that began in the 70s
I
did a double-take on a headline in the DMNews online version. It read, "Direct
will be marketers' go-to strategy this year." What happened, I thought. Did
general advertising slip in there and displace direct marketing while the
battle raged in Washington? Naw. The magazine thought Pepsi Cola's decision
to skip three million dollars in Super Bowl advertising in favor of a CRM
program kayoed the traditional ad business forever." Direct marketing is
now the centerpiece of all advertising," the magazine crooned. And while
I didn't phrase it exactly like that when I began to champion direct for
casinos in the late 70s, I did forecast the fall of traditional advertising.
But I predicted it would happen in the 90s. The minute a marketing guy could
show the GM what the ad cost and the room revenue it brought in--to the penny--I
knew it would be all over for general advertising. So I wrote two books to
hurry it along. But direct took a digital turn I didn't expect. It may leave
advertisers as baffled on the effectiveness of viral, mobile, social and
"ElfYourself" as they were on the old print and TV ads that couldn't be tracked.
What the hell--at least it's cheap.
top |
|
January 1,
2010: |
| Invitations
tell "what;" letters tell you "why."
I've
had casino executives from the GM on down tell me, "Nobody reads anymore,
so we keep our VIP invitations short and to the point." I never argue with
them because newspaper circulation is declining and magazines are going out
of business at a horrific rate. But people DO read. So once in a while I'll
ask if the casino had salesmen out on the road going door-to-door would he
tell them to stick strictly to the facts and keep the pitch short? Well,
no. A salesman needs time to sell. Exactly my point. But despite the fact
that letters of a page or more in length beat invitations and short letters
in every test I've seen, the casino business seems stuck on the short copy
approach. A potentially damaging message lurks just under the surface of
the typeset invitation. The message says, "This is an ad." A letter of at
least a page in l;length also carries a message. It says, "This is personal
communication." The typeset invitation is built on the offer and its features.
The letter is built on the offer and its benefits. The invitation tells you
"what." The letter tells you "why." Big difference. |
January 11,
2010: |
| Know the
difference, features vs. benefits
Do
you know the difference between a feature and a benefit? If you do, take
a moment to congratulate yourself. In nosing around casino marketing departments
I find only about 10% who do. Okay, so that's not very scientific--but my
point is, everyone should know the difference How do you write direct mail
or ads without such basic knowledge? For the 148th time, I'll explain it.
If the casino advertises "VIP line at the restaurant," is that a feature
or a benefit. It's a feature. It's part of a casino high end experience;
it distinguishes one casino from another. It's a characteristic of certain
casinos. Now here's the benefit: "You go right to your table with no waiting,
while the ordinary guests stand in line." Now, if your direct mail is supposed
to persuade guests to come to your property, would you simply write about
the VIP line, which still means "line" to many people? Or would you tell
your guests they'll go right to their tables with no waiting--which is a
major benefit, especially to seniors. Benefits sell. Your letters and ads
should be loaded with them. |
January 22,
2010: |
| How to
make friends of casino customers
According
to my friend, the late Ray Jutkins, if you're friendly in your direct mail
copy you'll make friends for your product, your service and your company.
How true. "Show your reader there's a warm, honest, flesh-and-blood human
being on the other end of that 800 number, reply envelope or coupon," Ray
always preached, and it pays off. I've been writing casino mail that way
for decades and it's never failed me. I was never more pleased than the day
my major casino client showed me a stack of letters he had received from
customers--thanking him for his letters, praising him and even telling him
when they'd be back at the property again. Imagine how many more customers
felt the same way but never took the time to write. For this particular client,
mail was not simply one of the dozen or so ways to market the property--it
was the single, most profitable way because it made the customers friends.
And friends tell friends.
top |
|
|